My bracelet

It turned out exactly as I wanted. It was a long process, and I'm to the point now where I don't absolutely HAVE to have the bracelet, like I felt about a month ago, but I'm still glad I got it.
It took a lot of patience from the maker of the bracelet, lots of emails, suggestions, trial and error, back and forth back and forth. But she wanted to make sure that it was exactly what I wanted and that it was perfect. I have never met her, but I know she is a patient and kind person who deeply cares about others' feelings. Even the feelings of strangers.


the front

It is a little on the "fancy" side, you know, for my standards. I don't know that I'd wear it around the house with my sweats on or while scrubbing bathtubs. I did wear it for the first time today. At church. I worry about a charm falling off, so I'm 100% aware of it while it's on. That ended up being a little hard at times. My mind would register the bracelet and then remind me that I wasn't pregnant anymore and didn't have a baby. In fact, last week was my due date from my first miscarriage back in September. I guess I still have to wait for time to help with the healing process. I miss being pregnant. We've been doing a lot of spring cleaning/moving-one-day-soon-hopefully cleaning and I had Chris put my maternity clothes back into the storage bin.

We've talked about trying to have another baby, and yes I probably will try, but I really don't want to go through this again, and I worry that I will. I worry a lot. But I still have hope! It's been a year of various trials and new learning experiences, and I just hope everyday that I am growing and becoming better. At the very least, I know I will survive. Everything that has happened and everything that will, I just have to remember that Heavenly Father will strengthen me and that Christ will take all my burdens upon Himself so they may be light.

But, I have my bracelet. It's exactly what I want to remember my baby boy!


the back